Relationships Harmony, Hmmm

Relationships are never easy for me. Dealing with myself is difficult enough without embracing a strange soul’s behavior. God, how quirky you've made me.

Love’s goal, our highest ideal offers challenges at every turn. With one human being I managed love. We knew each other, accepting faults as part of package. That didn't come freaking easy, but we did it. All I wanted was to be with him, pushing his wheel chair or in his hospital room; it didn't matter.

One Sunday you took him and that life away from me. My niece called it a new chapter for me to write. She’s a good girl. I wish I knew her better. 
The one person with whom I achieved a truly loving relationship died despite all of my efforts. My heart and soul are traumatized, battered into what?

I still don’t know, but finally calmed down enough to look around without frantic fear lost in space deer in a head lights, oh shit on my face. So God, I’m here for a reason. Right?!

What is it? Forgive me if I’m too stupid to figure this out. Whose idea was it that humans only use 10% of their brains? Okay, bottom line is I have difficulty with my concept of God, the Universe, or the big parent of it all. I've had your help in the past, so I do believe, but I don’t get you.

Perhaps it a question of harmony; Kirt and I became harmonious over a lifetime. When I quit bouncing off other beings, I may have my answer. Shit, this sounds so hard.

Today I will practice gliding, being in harmony with myself, not bumping into other beings. The lesson for the day shopping in harmony, egad; I’m going to the mall.